Book Report

I had all but convinced myself that blogging was a pointless endeavor: millions do it, most of them badly; it drains time and energy, fragile and limited assets in the best of times; the benefits are invisible, intangible, and unbankable.

Still, items in the news continually amuse me, and occasionally, as right now, several come together in a wonderful symbiotic way, crying out for acknowledgement. So with only the barest hint of editorial attitude I offer you the following items.

The Britney Spears Trilogy

On Tuesday, the Daily Mirror reported that Britney Spears was about to sign a deal to write her memoirs. The news has spread like wildfire, but it may only be a rumor. If the original report is true, Britney is poised to get $14 million for a three-book deal with an unnamed publisher.

The Sarah Palin Political Biography

$11 million for the story of the hockey-mom from Alaska who ran for vice president? Michael Muskal of the Los Angeles Times writes that Robert Barnett of the Washington legal world, the book deal czar, is working with Palin. Barnett sealed the book deals for both Hillary Clinton and Bill Clinton.

How to Talk to Girls

What will Alec Greven have left to wish for when he grows up? At the age of 9 he is already a noted expert on relations with the opposite sex – and a published author. Alec won a class writing contest with an entry called How to Talk to Girls. Before he knew it, he was on the local news. Then the Ellen DeGeneres show came calling. Shortly after that, Alec had an agent. Alec says all the information in “How to Talk to Girls” comes from life on the playground.

  • Boys should dress nicely and ask good questions.
  • Boys should not show off, act hyper, appear desperate, be mean, or use attention-getting gambits like flapping their arms like a chicken.
  • They should also exercise care when it comes to pretty girls. (Pretty girls are the ones with “big earrings, fancy dresses, and all the jewelry.”) “Pretty girls are like cars that need a lot of oil. The best choice for most boys is a regular girl.” The reason? “About 73 percent of regular girls ditch boys, but 98 percent of pretty girls ditch boys.”
  • “Whatever happens, don’t let it make you crazy.”

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