Calling all writers

It’s estimated that one in every five Americans is trying to write a novel. (In Brooklyn, the figure is four in every five.) So sixty million of you are trying to write a novel, and some of you aren’t sure where to start, what to write about.

A couple possibly-related suggestions from this morning’s local paper.

First off, Prince Charles of England. Prince Charles? That humdrum cipher. Who would want to write about him? Ah, but wait. Something new has been added. Turns out that Chuck is distantly related to the fifteenth-century Romanian ruler, Vlad III, Prince of Wallachia (1431–1476). Vlad III was the son of Vlad II, who was known as Dragon. In Romanian, son of Dragon works out to be Dracula. Really. Bonnie Prince Chaz is related — albeit somewhat distantly — to Count Dracula. And isn’t vampiracy, or whatever it’s called, rilly rilly popular with young TV watchers these days?

On a related note, the estate of Dr. Jack Kevorkian plans to sell several paintings done by the man who invented a suicide machine, and spent time in prison on charges of second degree murder when his machine worked successfully on several people. One of the paintings was made with a pint of Doctor Jack’s own blood.

Make of it what you will, but do it now. Someone else is already at work on an opus which will option to Martin Scorcese or James Cameron for upwards of $400,000. (I want only the standard ten percent.)

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